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doedoedoedoedoedoedoedoe said:
update i took some ibuprofen (childrens ibuprofen, we don't have regular ibuprofen for some reason) and the symptoms seem to have gone away luckily
all is well [wholesome] seems like google is telling me the problem will fix itself in about 6 weeks
i think i'm either gonna throw them away or wait until my body fully develops to even consider taking something like that (25+)
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Stay safe.
 
at the hospital at the moment
hopefully things go well but they haven't called anybody yet
 
doedoedoedoedoedoedoedoe said:
ever since my girlfriend was murdered and her killer took her own life right afterwards i've been thinking more and more about ACKing
i guess ironically enough the only things preventing me from doing it are the bernd hanging jaks i don't want to look like and say that as ridiculous as it sounds
i've been having dual enrollment where my high school sends me off to a college campus 5 times a week to take classes and it's taken WAY too much of a toll on me despite the several extra hours of free time contrary to regular high school
there have been a lot of things i've thought about doing to maybe cope and ease out the pain but each "method" has way too many fucking consequences and drawbacks. i've thought about maybe taking lifting more seriously and taking roids and perhaps hope the test boosts my mood and gives me extra gains o algo
and then the other less conventional option would've been to skip classes to go to a nature reserve and unwind but i live in an urban shithole where theres no trees for at least 10 miles out
i know killing myself won't solve shit and it'll just ruin the people around me, but i know for a fact that the person i was before that happened isn't there anymore and there is only a reflection of myself
physically i'm still alive and still breathing but everyone around me noticed a huge change in demeanor and now i don't think any of my friends want to talk to me anymore because of how shitty of a mood i'm always in
even when i'm locked up in my room and able to cope with some shit like games or music or art i get rudely interrupted by my family (who, i do care about) but they're always asking me for trivial shit
"can you grab me some water" or "can you help me with _" which i always do for them but sometimes it gets aggravating when i'm looking at pictures of my late girlfriend and reading her love letters to myself and i get called by my mom to ask to borrow something
life doesn't seem to be getting better, but i can only hope at this point

tl:dr my girlfriend is dead and it sucks
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Hope you're okay and effectively coping with the grief.
 
Fortuna said:
Did you go alone?
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no, my dad came with me
NigKiller_Tojo said:
holy shit were the roids bad or something. this is why drugs are scary
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the steroid I used was advertised as a safe cycle with little to no side effects and all you had to worry about was balding gyno acne and liver toxicity
it was not safe and it fucked up my heart
don't ever lay hands on any kind of steroids or SARMs until you are a fully developed adult
I know people are gonna laugh and joke telling me I'm a retard but steroids or hormone altering substances are not to be played with or taken lightly
 
doedoedoedoedoedoedoedoe said:
no, my dad came with me

the steroid I used was advertised as a safe cycle with little to no side effects and all you had to worry about was balding gyno acne and liver toxicity
it was not safe and it fucked up my heart
don't ever lay hands on any kind of steroids or SARMs until you are a fully developed adult
I know people are gonna laugh and joke telling me I'm a retard but steroids or hormone altering substances are not to be played with or taken lightly
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Are trying to build strength or muscle mass?
 
doedoedoedoedoedoedoedoe said:
no, my dad came with me

the steroid I used was advertised as a safe cycle with little to no side effects and all you had to worry about was balding gyno acne and liver toxicity
it was not safe and it fucked up my heart
don't ever lay hands on any kind of steroids or SARMs until you are a fully developed adult
I know people are gonna laugh and joke telling me I'm a retard but steroids or hormone altering substances are not to be played with or taken lightly
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despite some previous disagreements with you, I hope you get better and don't have any permanent effects. shit like this is why I am always wary of drugs, even medical ones
 
doedoedoedoedoedoedoedoe said:
doctors urine sampled me and I'm waiting
I don't know if it includes sarms they still haven't called me yet
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You need to tell them, but you don't need to tell your dad.
_account said:
Muscle mass is overrated. Strength is all that really matters and there's no shortcut to building it. Take care of your body but remember, it's just temporary.
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My body is all I have. That being said, it's not much. I guess I have my mind too; I like my mind.
 
UPDATE FOR THOSE INTERESTED IR CONCERNED
I HAVE BEEN DISCHARGED FROM THE HOSPITAL
I HAVE NO HEART OR CARDIOVASCULAR PROBLEMS AND THE DOCTORS MADE THE VERDICT THAT I HAD A SEVERE ANXIETY ATTACK
I AM NOW GETTING ANXIETY MEDICATION
NO MORE HEALTH SCARES!!! [wholesome] [wholesome][wholesome][wholesome]
 
doedoedoedoedoedoedoedoe said:
UPDATE FOR THOSE INTERESTED IR CONCERNED
I HAVE BEEN DISCHARGED FROM THE HOSPITAL
I HAVE NO HEART OR CARDIOVASCULAR PROBLEMS AND THE DOCTORS MADE THE VERDICT THAT I HAD A SEVERE ANXIETY ATTACK
I AM NOW GETTING ANXIETY MEDICATION
NO MORE HEALTH SCARES!!! [wholesome] [wholesome][wholesome][wholesome]
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Sounds like it might have been partially my fault then. I'm sorry.
 
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