I can't stand my nigger incel life now, I can't even play video games anymore because that requires effort. Nearly 5 months have passed since graduation and I feel my mind withering away more and more as the days pass. Today I was home alone from 9 AM to 5 PM and it was horrible. Nothing is entertaining anymore, not video games, not Top Gear, not watching shooting videos, nothing. It has gotten so bad that I now have full-on conversations with myself out loud as a way to pass the time. I'm going to see if I can arrange some sort of weekly outing with my sister, even just going to the store to buy a bottle of water helps a lot.
I'm drifting through life now, I don't get anything accomplished, I just exist and breathe and it feels like some form of stasis. It's getting harder to even feed myself, it feels like a chore.