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3/6/2024:
Terrible day. I woke up almost half an hour late and I had to rush to get ready. Then, at work, the people would not stop pestering me today. It’s like every one of those morons had some tech issue. They were so stupidly easy to fix that probably anybody on this website could do it. I hate boomers so fucking much bros. They act like they’re entitled to anything, and at the same time they’re so ignorant of everything. I had an eye doctor appointment today and I found out my eyes are only getting worse. I have glasses but I don’t wear them because I look like a fag with them on. I’m really unsure on how much longer I can take at this shitty job. I’ve already been thinking of quitting and going full NEET. It’s enough that I already have so many stresses in my life, like my medicine making me more depressed, my parents’ constant bitching about how I’m not in a relationship with anyone, and so many other things. I really want to just stay inside all day and do fuck all for the next few years. That’s all for now.
sorry to hear the day was bad
i'm glad i don't have parents who get pissed over me not being in a relationship with a lady, doe i feel just as stressed as you sometimes with what i deal with IRL too
get some sleep as soon as you can so you can wake up feeling better, maybe do a little bit of reading before bed or have a small snack to calm down. saltine crackers, black grapes, and some room-temp water always does it for me if i need a pleasant little meal before bed time
 
sorry to hear the day was bad
i'm glad i don't have parents who get pissed over me not being in a relationship with a lady, doe i feel just as stressed as you sometimes with what i deal with IRL too
get some sleep as soon as you can so you can wake up feeling better, maybe do a little bit of reading before bed or have a small snack to calm down. saltine crackers, black grapes, and some room-temp water always does it for me if i need a pleasant little meal before bed time
Thanks for the advice. Unfortunately, I have pretty much no appetite whatsoever right now. I tried eating something, just because I thought I should, but I seriously can’t eat. If I need to calm down I usually just take a nap which is what I did today. I’m gonna need to take some sleeping pills to get to bed tonight.
 
Thanks for the advice. Unfortunately, I have pretty much no appetite whatsoever right now. I tried eating something, just because I thought I should, but I seriously can’t eat. If I need to calm down I usually just take a nap which is what I did today. I’m gonna need to take some sleeping pills to get to bed tonight.
well good luck, and to at least provide you with something to help calm your nerves, here's a nice lyre harp song that i find to be quite tranquil
 
3/6/2024:
Terrible day. I woke up almost half an hour late and I had to rush to get ready. Then, at work, the people would not stop pestering me today. It’s like every one of those morons had some tech issue. They were so stupidly easy to fix that probably anybody on this website could do it. I hate boomers so fucking much bros. They act like they’re entitled to anything, and at the same time they’re so ignorant of everything. I had an eye doctor appointment today and I found out my eyes are only getting worse. I have glasses but I don’t wear them because I look like a fag with them on. I’m really unsure on how much longer I can take at this shitty job. I’ve already been thinking of quitting and going full NEET. It’s enough that I already have so many stresses in my life, like my medicine making me more depressed, my parents’ constant bitching about how I’m not in a relationship with anyone, and so many other things. I really want to just stay inside all day and do fuck all for the next few years. That’s all for now.
what a pussy geg just fix their computers you fuckin nerd
 
3/6/2024:
Terrible day. I woke up almost half an hour late and I had to rush to get ready. Then, at work, the people would not stop pestering me today. It’s like every one of those morons had some tech issue. They were so stupidly easy to fix that probably anybody on this website could do it. I hate boomers so fucking much bros. They act like they’re entitled to anything, and at the same time they’re so ignorant of everything. I had an eye doctor appointment today and I found out my eyes are only getting worse. I have glasses but I don’t wear them because I look like a fag with them on. I’m really unsure on how much longer I can take at this shitty job. I’ve already been thinking of quitting and going full NEET. It’s enough that I already have so many stresses in my life, like my medicine making me more depressed, my parents’ constant bitching about how I’m not in a relationship with anyone, and so many other things. I really want to just stay inside all day and do fuck all for the next few years. That’s all for now.
Wordswordswords the left can't meme
 
>In a future not distant enough to be fully populated by overweight black trans queens, but close enough for the great reset to already have taken place, we meet our hero.

>We zoom in on a typical sized pod apartment complex somewhere in the southern united states. Our hero, Cobson, is getting ready for his daily pozzing. After a slow-burn, lynichian, a-24 produced sex scene where he gets railed by Tyrone, Cobby is focred back into his room to play video games, while the BVLL gets back to his loving relationship with Cobson's wife, Soytan.

>While Cobson is reasonabely happy - he eats ze bugs, drinks ze soy, lives in a pod, and owns nothing - he can't help but feel that he was always meant to be somone else.

>we than follow cobson's typical week… The daily vaccines, the estrogen pills, MCU and nintendo indoctrination, and so on. We witness the decaying streets of future america, full of overweight mentally handicapped amerimutts, soyjaks and surveyed constantly by the GLOBAL LAWFULNESS ORGANIZATION WARRIORS (G.L.O.W). All this goes on under the approval of great leader colonel Schwab.

>We witness Cob's slow yet growing disgust with his life and the society around him, his feelings of alienation form his wife Soytan, and his growing dislike of Tyrone, Eventually Cob does an act which is strictly forbidden under glowie law - he enters the last functioning imageboard and chud haven, a future remnant of 4cuck, which has become completely identical to reddit, save for allowing to use a single word which has become illegal anywhere else - NIGGER.

>After a long night of browsing the 'cuck, Cobson is filled with existential dread and nihlism, much like in his favourite tv show Rick and Morty. "Am i becoming a racist neo nazi incel chud? (even doe i don't know the meaning of any of those words as they were outlawed by the favcian reform of '79 albeit?)", "Is it over, is the vvest falling, why the h*ck am i saying this?!" those were the questions haunting cobby throughout the night…

Next morning Soytan urges cobson to "be the sissy slut he's meant to be" as tyrone starts to undress. Cob, in an act of defiance, shouts "I will not be a sissy slut no more". Soytan panicks and tells tyrone that cob seems to forget that black lives matter. Cobson, not fully comprehending the weight of his speech, proceeds to shout "get away from that nigger!".

>The screen cuts to black, and cobson wakes up in the G.L.O.W world headquarters, with proconsul Feral sitting in a spherical floating pod, looking down on the chained Cobson. For the crime of anti-poc microagression, he will be sentenced for life, sent to the nature reserve of Sweden.

>Cobson is sent to the autonomous republic of Sverge… In this time period, there are no national borders and world culture has been homogonised and numbed down. Sweden however, was allowed to continue existing as a sort of "indian reserve", where pre-4th industrial revolution life could be observed and heckin wholsome indigenous rights are relevant. Sweden is also where criminals are sent.

>During his time in Sverge, Cobson gets to see a diffrenet lifestyle, one not approved by colonel schwab, yet one that seems weirdly apealing… it is also in Sverge that Cob meets a new, unlikely ally…

>One time after celebrating thanksgiving with the swedes, cob decides to explore the Svenska-village hall more deeply, as he wasn't used for dwellings that aren't pods. He walks downstairs, eventually coming upon a dark and eerie room - the basement.

>Sitting infront of his computer with a notable hunch, there sits a relic of another time, a real life chud. At first contact both are horrified - Cobson shouts, as per indoctrination, various BLM and trans rights slogan, while chuddy shouts antisemetic and transphobic comments. Despite their initial discomfort, both slowly become friends. Chud teaches Cobson things he never could imagine - racial slurs, Aryanime trad gooning sessions and so on.

>Cobson and Chud eventually agree to plan an anti-schwab uprising, filling the swedish people with a spirit of revolt. Proconsul Feral becomes aware of this and says to his glowie army "you VVILL not interfere, i VVILL deal with those reactionary pisscels myself".

>Using his spherical floating pod, feral reaches sverge, ready to destroy cobson and chud. Cobson however, using his knowledge regarding bbc didlods, was taught by chud how to use a kitchen knife, the only weopen he ever held. With chud;'s hyperborean war tactics and cob's dildo knife they dfeat feral, and send him to the local mental asylum, where he is treated with meds and bbc (in that order!).

>Using feral's pod, they fake their identity and reach schvvabs headquarters. immediately an epic cgi battle proceeds. schvvab being an old man, is helped by semi mechanical troons, however he gets defeated. seeing as he doesnt have much time, he agrees to show cobson and chud what the world was like before the great reset. he take sthem into a secret room, where grec o roman busts of soot, kusnetsov, doll and froot are held. "zese people were free sinkers, much like you, but zat vas a long time ago.. chud i vas the victorian child from the reddit meme, and in my yous i vasnt much diffrenet from you. but i realized somesing, the problem in zis vorld vasnt just ze niggers, or ze jooz, or zew foids or any ofzose, it vas humanity itself. For the imagination of man's heart is evil from his youth" these were schvvabs last words before he collapsed. Chud realised schvvab was quting the bible, a book he never read even doe it is trad albeit it is written by da jooz or something. Cobson and Chud get the loyalty of the glownigger army, and proceed to form a new governmant, where one can be happy without having to eat ze bugs, or own nothing.
 
Samefag kike detected. Kill yourself, Samefag kike.
die kike die. DIE KIKE DIE. you're going to the gas chamber. you're going to the oven. the #Trump2020 reich will gas ALL KIKES. Trump is führer, Trump is GOD.
die kike die. DIE KIKE DIE. you're going to the gas chamber. you're going to the oven. the #Trump2020 reich will gas ALL KIKES. Trump is führer, Trump is GOD.
die kike die. DIE KIKE DIE. you're going to the gas chamber. you're going to the oven. the #Trump2020 reich will gas ALL KIKES. Trump is führer, Trump is GOD.
die kike die. DIE KIKE DIE. you're going to the gas chamber. you're going to the oven. the #Trump2020 reich will gas ALL KIKES. Trump is führer, Trump is GOD.
die kike die. DIE KIKE DIE. you're going to the gas chamber. you're going to the oven. the #Trump2020 reich will gas ALL KIKES. Trump is führer, Trump is GOD.
die kike die. DIE KIKE DIE. you're going to the gas chamber. you're going to the oven. the #Trump2020 reich will gas ALL KIKES. Trump is führer, Trump is GOD.
die kike die. DIE KIKE DIE. you're going to the gas chamber. you're going to the oven. the #Trump2020 reich will gas ALL KIKES. Trump is führer, Trump is GOD.
die kike die. DIE KIKE DIE. you're going to the gas chamber. you're going to the oven. the #Trump2020 reich will gas ALL KIKES. Trump is führer, Trump is GOD.
die kike die. DIE KIKE DIE. you're going to the gas chamber. you're going to the oven. the #Trump2020 reich will gas ALL KIKES. Trump is führer, Trump is GOD.
die kike die. DIE KIKE DIE. you're going to the gas chamber. you're going to the oven. the #Trump2020 reich will gas ALL KIKES. Trump is führer, Trump is GOD.
 
3/7/2024:
I was exhausted so I went to bed as early as possible. It’s now 1 AM and i’m awake. It was the same routine today. I hated going to work and doing my job. I fucking hate it. I need to seriously quit. I have a pounding headache right now so i can’t hardly think. It’s been maybe 6 hours now i’ve had a headache. chances are it’s the medication that’s causing it. that’s so retarded. i would think you take medicine to get better, not to worry about side effects. that’s all for now.
 
3/7/2024:
I was exhausted so I went to bed as early as possible. It’s now 1 AM and i’m awake. It was the same routine today. I hated going to work and doing my job. I fucking hate it. I need to seriously quit. I have a pounding headache right now so i can’t hardly think. It’s been maybe 6 hours now i’ve had a headache. chances are it’s the medication that’s causing it. that’s so retarded. i would think you take medicine to get better, not to worry about side effects. that’s all for now.
>1 AM
Go back to sleep!
 
3/8/2024:
Dad's in hospice care. I didn't imagine it would happen so soon or so suddenly. I thought he was getting better. To see him in such a state is heartbreaking to me. He can hardly talk because it simply hurts him. What alarmed me is how little I cried. Everyone around me was crying so, so much, but I cried only in private, and not very heavily. I am sad. I can't seem to figure out why I can't cry. It doesn't matter though. I wonder what must be going through my father's head right now. He has to face his own mortality, and at such an untimely age, too. I've pretty much tried to not think about it whatsoever. If I do I might go mad with grief. I don't want to grieve for him yet. He isn't dead. I'll keep out any hope that he may live, if not for his sake then for my own. When he told me, I couldn't think of anything else to do than to hug him and tell him I love him. There's still so much I wanted to do with him that I may now never get to do. I don't want to repress my feelings but it's all I can think to do. At least I'll have something to talk about at therapy. That's all for now.
 
3/9/2024:
I didn't do much of anything. I couldn't have. I'm still reeling from the news I got yesterday. My father is doing better than he was yesterday, but I know it's still a matter of time before he goes. I want to prepare myself for the fact that he's going to die, yet at the same time I don't want to treat him as if he already has. While I thought I had accepted that fact, today he got a letter from his work. The letter was the usual stuff, well-wishing and condolences. They read almost like eulogies. Inside the letter were some movie tickets. There were enough tickets for each of the members of my family, minus one. I don't think they did this intentionally, but it was enough to make me cry. I didn't cry immediately, it waited until I was alone in my room. I'm happy, as it were, that I was able to cry, if only briefly. My dad has been doing the exact same things as he's usually done. This makes me wonder if he's known he was going to die for a while now. I hope not. I don't want to remember my dad for how he's been the past year and a half, and I'm sure he doesn't want me to remember him that way either. It's just so tragic. That's all for now.
 
This week I did my things again again, turned in a shit ton of assignments, went out to a dance club with someone I like and spent the night with them. I also did my first session with my new tutoring client. I also found this blogpost and felt better about my life knowing it is not as shit as this guys.

I hate reading what you write, I read the same kind of shit on wizardchan and I get a deep sense of despair. Don't become a NEET, there are fewer things worse in life than having no purpose. You will have died before you die. I hope you spend some time with your father. For the rest of your life you will remember how you spent your time at this very moment. I offer my condolences to you. I hope you are able to get better. I was in a state of deep despair, and while I wasn't exactly like you, I know where these feelings come from. They can get better. For me it took a radical change in my life to knock me into the, not perfect but much better, state than I was before.

Don't loose hope. Don't give up on life, you only have one.
 
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