Chud Sexual experiences with girls...

feel free to start a convo with me and ask all the questions you like we can be friends maybe
im somewhat of an enigma, i don't exactly understand myself, i don't consider myself to be interesting, just a very strange entity. i base myself based off of what other people say and do and bounce off of that, so if you like drawing, i'll pick up a pen and a tablet and try to draw to get approval, etc. that's how i've always gotten along with people, theres nothing about me that personally makes me stand out or interesting, i'm really just a lost autist forever masking or trying to mask.

then there's love which i've never understood, i THOUGHT i understood it once, when I was extremely lonely, I thought I wanted a gf but in actuality all i wanted was a best friend or a friend, i dont like sex nor do I want it, but the idea of kisses and cuddles doesn't sound too bad, but now it sounds not desirable. idk, i miss having like a best friend, i guess, but a part of me wants to find myself and try to become a real person in a sense, try to get something like a hobby or something that makes me interesting

but... without other people, i have no passion. i only do things because of other people, im developing a game right now for my college, and im here because im lonely and i need something to cure my loneliness, and this website seems to do it. just having other people here to talk to about anything, i think it helps me find myself, because i cannot exist without other people and i think that's just the truth, i need people to motivate me and to inspire me to actually do shit and without them, i just have no support at all, i just feel like a nobody, someone who's not motivated to do anything, someone who just has nothing to live for.

i make these posts because idk, i hope people read them. hopefully i can stick around on this site long enough for people like you to notice me a lot more and eventually, we can be friends or something like that. if you wouldn't mind.
ok that's alright idk how the conversation system works but i sent you one
 
fnf_twerk.gif

>feel free to start a convo with me and ask all the questions you like we can be friends maybe
im somewhat of an enigma, i don't exactly understand myself, i don't consider myself to be interesting, just a very strange entity. i base myself based off of what other people say and do and bounce off of that, so if you like drawing, i'll pick up a pen and a tablet and try to draw to get approval, etc. that's how i've always gotten along with people, theres nothing about me that personally makes me stand out or interesting, i'm really just a lost autist forever masking or trying to mask.
>then there's love which i've never understood, i THOUGHT i understood it once, when I was extremely lonely, I thought I wanted a gf but in actuality all i wanted was a best friend or a friend, i dont like sex nor do I want it, but the idea of kisses and cuddles doesn't sound too bad, but now it sounds not desirable. idk, i miss having like a best friend, i guess, but a part of me wants to find myself and try to become a real person in a sense, try to get something like a hobby or something that makes me interesting
>but... without other people, i have no passion. i only do things because of other people, im developing a game right now for my college, and im here because im lonely and i need something to cure my loneliness, and this website seems to do it. just having other people here to talk to about anything, i think it helps me find myself, because i cannot exist without other people and i think that's just the truth, i need people to motivate me and to inspire me to actually do shit and without them, i just have no support at all, i just feel like a nobody, someone who's not motivated to do anything, someone who just has nothing to live for.
>i make these posts because idk, i hope people read them. hopefully i can stick around on this site long enough for people like you to notice me a lot more and eventually, we can be friends or something like that. if you wouldn't mind.
 
feel free to start a convo with me and ask all the questions you like we can be friends maybe
im somewhat of an enigma, i don't exactly understand myself, i don't consider myself to be interesting, just a very strange entity. i base myself based off of what other people say and do and bounce off of that, so if you like drawing, i'll pick up a pen and a tablet and try to draw to get approval, etc. that's how i've always gotten along with people, theres nothing about me that personally makes me stand out or interesting, i'm really just a lost autist forever masking or trying to mask.

then there's love which i've never understood, i THOUGHT i understood it once, when I was extremely lonely, I thought I wanted a gf but in actuality all i wanted was a best friend or a friend, i dont like sex nor do I want it, but the idea of kisses and cuddles doesn't sound too bad, but now it sounds not desirable. idk, i miss having like a best friend, i guess, but a part of me wants to find myself and try to become a real person in a sense, try to get something like a hobby or something that makes me interesting

but... without other people, i have no passion. i only do things because of other people, im developing a game right now for my college, and im here because im lonely and i need something to cure my loneliness, and this website seems to do it. just having other people here to talk to about anything, i think it helps me find myself, because i cannot exist without other people and i think that's just the truth, i need people to motivate me and to inspire me to actually do shit and without them, i just have no support at all, i just feel like a nobody, someone who's not motivated to do anything, someone who just has nothing to live for.

i make these posts because idk, i hope people read them. hopefully i can stick around on this site long enough for people like you to notice me a lot more and eventually, we can be friends or something like that. if you wouldn't mind.
i also find the female body to in general be repulisve, same with men. but personally, i'm always just going to be in the persuit of a next best friend or something like that, and i don't want it to be someone in the real world, because i hate the real world, and i hate "real people" and quite frankly, as much as i hate to admit it, the internet is my home now. i don't care what people say, terminally online this or that, there's just no hope for me, i'm that autistic that i genuinely find irl conversations to be not as good as internet discussions. but with all this talk about not finding outside to even be real, like the internet feels more real than outside, i do understand that i use the internet far too much, but ultimately, there's nothing for me out there, nobody talks to me and i don't talk to anybody, and i guess it's because i'm just not that interesting.

i dont want a gf but one thing i do want is to be seen as important by people or to feel needed and validated in some way, to feel important in general, like if i ceased to exist, things wouldn't be the same. i've always longed for that feeling of having someone or something depend on me, and yet nothing ever has and nothing ever will. i live in a world that does not require me, but i require it and all the changes i want, i have to make them happen. things feel fruitless often though, but i know that if i keep trying hopefully someday i can achieve that goal somehow.
 
What are some you have had with women:

4chan chick:

Girl that was into me from 4chan's /soc/ board... she came onto me. I wasn't really into it at first because I wasn't looking for love at that time. She also felt super young to me, but she is only 1 year younger than me. I just got a very youthful vibe from her.

She says she'll be soaking wet and sends a paragraph on how badly she wants me. I am a little freaked out, but she lives some states away, so why not get some femanon coochie tbh...

She fingered herself to me over the phone. I didn't really get much from it because of the aforementioned reasons, but lol. I sort of got to see pictures of her boobs, but not really any good shots.


Anyways, I didn't really consider this a win. She turned out to be a bit of a mean girl, and I felt guilt for her seeming so young and having some... mental issues (I did too at that time, she played into that as well and seemed to want a toxic situation)

She broke up with me... I was upset, not sure why. She has a bf now, which is good for her, but lol. I don't know why she was so into me at first. BPD girls, I guess.


But yeah, she was a bully in the past too... so fuck her. tbh




PoF girl:


Nothing special here... She sent me a vid of her touching herself. Vids of her playing with her boobs. It was chill ig.

Fb dating girl:

She sent me a full pic of her boobs with her face in it.

I have posted no NSFW images, so I hope this isn't a rule breaking.
also im the femanon in this story. I'm trans and broke up with him due to complications with my rotting neovagina
 
unironically women's breast, last gf i had i took things really slow with, i regret that relationship entirely doe
<reddit space or whatever
ironically every incel's mother
 
Can you go back to having sex with everybody's moms again nigga what the fuck is this
its true though. and im sorry for losing the gimmick, it was fun but i started to realize that this site is more than just for shitposting so now im being serious.
i should probably change my pfp to reflect this change but idk maybe the ufkcing uhh mentally ill schizo has taken over my account the real soygoy is gone what teh frick?!?
 
>its true though. and im sorry for losing the gimmick, it was fun but i started to realize that this site is more than just for shitposting so now im being serious.
>i should probably change my pfp to reflect this change but idk maybe the ufkcing uhh mentally ill schizo has taken over my account the real soygoy is gone what teh frick?!?

70236 - SoyBooru.png
 
its true though. and im sorry for losing the gimmick, it was fun but i started to realize that this site is more than just for shitposting so now im being serious.
i should probably change my pfp to reflect this change but idk maybe the ufkcing uhh mentally ill schizo has taken over my account the real soygoy is gone what teh frick?!?
Trvke. I wanted my account to be some 'plier saying some retarded shit, but ended up posting many serious things.

I also find woman body strange. My close family has much more men than women and I was never accustomed to it especially when there was no girl in my age to spend time with like sister or cousin.
Smaller body, small hands, bigger face in relation to head, wide hips are strange for me. And I dislike women who are too feminine.
 
Nothing yet, since, for my own reasons of religion, I'd like to save any sexual occurrences for after I'm married, but I hugged a girl who I really like and who I'm friends with just last week, which is the first time something like that, of feeling any intimacy with a girl, has happened to me. Was saying goodbye to her before we left for Spring break and she initiated our little embrace before we parted ways from school. I know she only believes of us as close friends, and probably isn't interested at the moment in advancing to anything further than that, but her care really warms my heart. Thinking about it still makes me smile.
If only I could be that religious.
 
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