im glad i didnt go through any of that at all honestly, if i were younger i would have probably wanted so badly to be in your position, but ofcourse i think we now both know just how much of a disaster that is. if you want to be with someone, you should probably weigh your existing relationship with them and the qualities they have and whether they are marriage material. if you're really good friends with someone chances are you could probably transition into a higher level of relationship easily as time goes on, that's how it usually goes in my mind, but these days people are just looking to get into that kind of relationship with no ground work, often trying to ease into it immediately with sex, when something like that should only occur months into a relationship.
i suppose i have an interesting viewpoint to some, that as a man, if you want a gf, you should be dating your girl friend. as in, your female friend, because that's what that is, right? its a friend with a higher level of intimacy, and if you can't have a good friend in that relationship then i can garruntee it wouldn't be a great relationship at all. this kind of thing is why friendship is so important to me, it's better than anything else and people stick together without feckle things like sex and fetishes and stuff, its why being friends with men is so easy in comparison to being friends with women where quite honestly i try to be nice but not too nice just to make sure that they don't go thinking weird things and then assuming im sucking up to them for some reason that im not but then again that's just my anxiety assuming how i think other people might react and think and feel, but that anxiety around women is why i often tend to just stay away from them because it's not worth it and i don't want to feel weird and i can garruntee that nobody really wants to feel weird like that.
but despite that, in my mind, the best relationships come from a place of trust and belonging, not from a place of sexual gratification.
t. no relationship experience at all. geg.