I’m not sure, for I think it's a good point she brings. We are commanded to honor our parents, of course, but I’m sitting here right now in thought of your entire situation, and how scripture would then align to it further, for, it's very clear that the situation your mother brought upon you has been a difficult mountain in your life, and it'd be impossible to use one simple sentence as a whole solution. Your mother ran off and abandoned you, clearly terrible, for she forsook her own duties in the very sight of her own, dependent offspring. Absolutely horrid of her to do that to you and your family, not even submitting to your father, to at least stay by and care for what she brought into the world. Obviously, she is not a proper woman, and, if you still know of her current situation, I’m confident you’d affirm she still isn’t one now from how you talk of her. What I will tell you is, by the grace that inhabits your heart through the Holy Spirit, you must use that grace to forgive the people who have wrought the worst hurt on you, just as Christ forgave us for what we have done to dishonor Him. Forgiveness would not mean that we are to then forget what our enemies have done to us, but rather, to remember what God has granted us, forgiveness, and His ever-present will that is within our lives, and that lets challenges strike us so that they may guide us to Him and provide us with wisdom through triumph. This does not mean you need to write the nasty woman who is known as your mother a happy, passive letter of "it's okay that you shattered this family and put all of it upon my father, I love you!", but that you must let go of the retaliation you feel towards her with your thoughts in order to fulfill the commandment of honoring her, and know that God is the one who will provide ample judgement, so He has taken that responsibility from you with His ultimate presiding upon all of humanity, and so your hands are free from gripping onto that hatred, all through Him, if that makes sense.