How do other people see you in real life?

This feels like a complete suckoff thread so I hope this doesn't across as too egotistical or egocentric.

People like me but I hate myself. I like watching Chris Chan videos a lot and sometimes fear that I am similar to him, but I have to remind myself that I am not Chris Chan and never will be, just because I have special interests and autism and currently no idea with what I want to do with my life, that doesn't make me Chris Chan, but watching Chris Chan videos makes me want to go out, get a job immediately, spend all of my time outdoors immediately, sell every piece of materialistic possessions that I own, immediately get a wife, ditch the internet completely and then top it all off with a jesus christ "The past never happened you were always perfect" spell.

Most people are seemingly impressed with my projects and stuff, but I'm always afraid that I am a failure, that my work is not even good, it sucks, but everyone else seems to disagree. My family is very proud of me seemingly and people at college are impressed with the project I made for my vocational, but I can't help this nagging thought in my brain that brings up all these horrible people that tells me I have to strive for absolute perfection or else I will end up exactly like them. I suppose that's a healthy thing, but it's also kind of a bad thing.

Apart from that, nobody has ever described me in a third person context, maybe words like "smart" and one of my tutors even called me the guy from Good Will Hunting even though I am not Will Hunting from Good Will Hunting but he thought I was, atleast. I seemingly don't have the greatest view of myself, whereas in actuality, people are just nice and friendly and not everyone hates you for unknown reasons. I guess I'm a perfectionist and it kind of hurts, but sometimes it is a good thing.
 
This feels like a complete suckoff thread so I hope this doesn't across as too egotistical or egocentric.

People like me but I hate myself. I like watching Chris Chan videos a lot and sometimes fear that I am similar to him, but I have to remind myself that I am not Chris Chan and never will be, just because I have special interests and autism and currently no idea with what I want to do with my life, that doesn't make me Chris Chan, but watching Chris Chan videos makes me want to go out, get a job immediately, spend all of my time outdoors immediately, sell every piece of materialistic possessions that I own, immediately get a wife, ditch the internet completely and then top it all off with a jesus christ "The past never happened you were always perfect" spell.

Most people are seemingly impressed with my projects and stuff, but I'm always afraid that I am a failure, that my work is not even good, it sucks, but everyone else seems to disagree. My family is very proud of me seemingly and people at college are impressed with the project I made for my vocational, but I can't help this nagging thought in my brain that brings up all these horrible people that tells me I have to strive for absolute perfection or else I will end up exactly like them. I suppose that's a healthy thing, but it's also kind of a bad thing.

Apart from that, nobody has ever described me in a third person context, maybe words like "smart" and one of my tutors even called me the guy from Good Will Hunting even though I am not Will Hunting from Good Will Hunting but he thought I was, atleast. I seemingly don't have the greatest view of myself, whereas in actuality, people are just nice and friendly and not everyone hates you for unknown reasons. I guess I'm a perfectionist and it kind of hurts, but sometimes it is a good thing.
One big ego kick to me recently though was the fact that I managed to somehow undersell the game to playtesters, resulting in multiple people saying they thought my game was going to be shit but it actually turned out to be better than they thought. I have no idea if this is a win or what.
 
This feels like a complete suckoff thread so I hope this doesn't across as too egotistical or egocentric.

People like me but I hate myself. I like watching Chris Chan videos a lot and sometimes fear that I am similar to him, but I have to remind myself that I am not Chris Chan and never will be, just because I have special interests and autism and currently no idea with what I want to do with my life, that doesn't make me Chris Chan, but watching Chris Chan videos makes me want to go out, get a job immediately, spend all of my time outdoors immediately, sell every piece of materialistic possessions that I own, immediately get a wife, ditch the internet completely and then top it all off with a jesus christ "The past never happened you were always perfect" spell.

Most people are seemingly impressed with my projects and stuff, but I'm always afraid that I am a failure, that my work is not even good, it sucks, but everyone else seems to disagree. My family is very proud of me seemingly and people at college are impressed with the project I made for my vocational, but I can't help this nagging thought in my brain that brings up all these horrible people that tells me I have to strive for absolute perfection or else I will end up exactly like them. I suppose that's a healthy thing, but it's also kind of a bad thing.

Apart from that, nobody has ever described me in a third person context, maybe words like "smart" and one of my tutors even called me the guy from Good Will Hunting even though I am not Will Hunting from Good Will Hunting but he thought I was, atleast. I seemingly don't have the greatest view of myself, whereas in actuality, people are just nice and friendly and not everyone hates you for unknown reasons. I guess I'm a perfectionist and it kind of hurts, but sometimes it is a good thing.
my favorite chris chan character is definitely his dad he reminds me how technologically illiterate my parents are, it’s sort of wholesome to me in a way.
 
This feels like a complete suckoff thread so I hope this doesn't across as too egotistical or egocentric.

People like me but I hate myself. I like watching Chris Chan videos a lot and sometimes fear that I am similar to him, but I have to remind myself that I am not Chris Chan and never will be, just because I have special interests and autism and currently no idea with what I want to do with my life, that doesn't make me Chris Chan, but watching Chris Chan videos makes me want to go out, get a job immediately, spend all of my time outdoors immediately, sell every piece of materialistic possessions that I own, immediately get a wife, ditch the internet completely and then top it all off with a jesus christ "The past never happened you were always perfect" spell.

Most people are seemingly impressed with my projects and stuff, but I'm always afraid that I am a failure, that my work is not even good, it sucks, but everyone else seems to disagree. My family is very proud of me seemingly and people at college are impressed with the project I made for my vocational, but I can't help this nagging thought in my brain that brings up all these horrible people that tells me I have to strive for absolute perfection or else I will end up exactly like them. I suppose that's a healthy thing, but it's also kind of a bad thing.

Apart from that, nobody has ever described me in a third person context, maybe words like "smart" and one of my tutors even called me the guy from Good Will Hunting even though I am not Will Hunting from Good Will Hunting but he thought I was, atleast. I seemingly don't have the greatest view of myself, whereas in actuality, people are just nice and friendly and not everyone hates you for unknown reasons. I guess I'm a perfectionist and it kind of hurts, but sometimes it is a good thing.
Maybe you should stop overthinking stuff so much. This is woman behavior.
One big ego kick to me recently though was the fact that I managed to somehow undersell the game to playtesters, resulting in multiple people saying they thought my game was going to be shit but it actually turned out to be better than they thought. I have no idea if this is a win or what.
You make games?
 
Maybe you should stop overthinking stuff so much. This is woman behavior.

You make games?
i should probably develop my georgefloyd.exe parody project idea so people stop asking this question yes i make games yes i love godot i have mutliple godot projects all unfinished. people keep asking me if game dev is gonna be a career path fuck if i know, if it is then i'd hope it'd be freelancer but i'm not sure if it'll work out. i'll get my games on steam when they're all finished though and i got tons of ideas i wanna do. I can also 3D model in blender and make music in FL studio and stuff
 
i should probably develop my georgefloyd.exe parody project idea so people stop asking this question yes i make games yes i love godot i have mutliple godot projects all unfinished. people keep asking me if game dev is gonna be a career path fuck if i know, if it is then i'd hope it'd be freelancer but i'm not sure if it'll work out. i'll get my games on steam when they're all finished though and i got tons of ideas i wanna do. I can also 3D model in blender and make music in FL studio and stuff
What have you done so far? Or have worked on? What kinds of games?
 
What have you done so far? Or have worked on? What kinds of games?
heres my entire story: I started on Sploder and Scratch when I was 9 making crappy games, then moved to GameMaker when I was 12 to make a game about le depression. My GameMaker license mysteriously vanished so I moved to Godot. First game I made was a 2d top-downish game inspired by silent hill and resident evil where you solve puzzles and navigate a convoluted story involving dreams and shit. Second game I worked on was a game about a girl who's traumatized so she lives in her own world in her head and explores randomly generated planets (LSD inspired type game, hints of mario galaxy, convoluted story, won't explain any of it) Third game I've worked on was going to be an edgy school shooting hotline miami like simulator because I became fascinated with the idea of individuals getting into shootouts with police and trying to survive that kind of situation as one person (1 vs 10000 seems impossible, right? But gordan freeman comes out unscaved after fighting an entire millitary!) then another game I've worked on was a golfing game, and then, my vocational project.

My vocational project for college is a game where you kill zombies and visit 5 (only 3 doe cus unfinished) levels and kill zombies in waves, or get to the end and kil lzombies etc. It's a prototype so nothing interesting, but it exists. A common theme with all my projects is that they are all unfinished so I can't show anyone anything and they're all too ambitious for their own good to the point where they just can't be done without a lot of free time.

i repeat none of my games are fucking finishde aaaa
 
heres my entire story: I started on Sploder and Scratch when I was 9 making crappy games, then moved to GameMaker when I was 12 to make a game about le depression. My GameMaker license mysteriously vanished so I moved to Godot. First game I made was a 2d top-downish game inspired by silent hill and resident evil where you solve puzzles and navigate a convoluted story involving dreams and shit. Second game I worked on was a game about a girl who's traumatized so she lives in her own world in her head and explores randomly generated planets (LSD inspired type game, convoluted story, won't explain any of it) Third game I've worked on was going to be an edgy school shooting hotline miami like simulator because I became fascinated with the idea of individuals getting into shootouts with police and trying to survive that kind of situation as one person (1 vs 10000 seems impossible, right? But gordan freeman comes out unscaved after fighting an entire millitary!) then another game I've worked on was a golfing game, and then, my vocational project.

My vocational project for college is a game where you kill zombies and visit 5 (only 3 doe cus unfinished) levels and kill zombies in waves, or get to the end and kil lzombies etc. It's a prototype so nothing interesting, but it exists. A common theme with all my projects is that they are all unfinished so I can't show anyone anything and they're all too ambitious for their own good to the point where they just can't be done without a lot of free time.

i repeat none of my games are fucking finishde aaaa
I think I need to focus on simple ideas in the future and make more complex systems to ease on development time, e.g level generators so I don't have to design levels manually, I can just say "make me a fucking uhh burger king level" and it'll make me one by coding a procedural level gen system (I'm just like that, I like making systems in games to make developing the actual game easy af, so a weapon generation system where you input a bunch of variables and give the weapons special actions so you don't have to hard code everything etc)

my space explorer game is an absolute nightmare though becaues trying to do 3d world generation on a spherical object is like breaking my balls lol
 
heres my entire story: I started on Sploder and Scratch when I was 9 making crappy games, then moved to GameMaker when I was 12 to make a game about le depression. My GameMaker license mysteriously vanished so I moved to Godot. First game I made was a 2d top-downish game inspired by silent hill and resident evil where you solve puzzles and navigate a convoluted story involving dreams and shit. Second game I worked on was a game about a girl who's traumatized so she lives in her own world in her head and explores randomly generated planets (LSD inspired type game, convoluted story, won't explain any of it) Third game I've worked on was going to be an edgy school shooting hotline miami like simulator because I became fascinated with the idea of individuals getting into shootouts with police and trying to survive that kind of situation as one person (1 vs 10000 seems impossible, right? But gordan freeman comes out unscaved after fighting an entire millitary!) then another game I've worked on was a golfing game, and then, my vocational project.

My vocational project for college is a game where you kill zombies and visit 5 (only 3 doe cus unfinished) levels and kill zombies in waves, or get to the end and kil lzombies etc. It's a prototype so nothing interesting, but it exists. A common theme with all my projects is that they are all unfinished so I can't show anyone anything and they're all too ambitious for their own good to the point where they just can't be done without a lot of free time.

i repeat none of my games are fucking finishde aaaa
Did you make assets for them?
Maybe you should actually finish something for once. Unless you have a job or something you don't get to use the "muh no free time" excuse.
 
Did you make assets for them?
Maybe you should actually finish something for once. Unless you have a job or something you don't get to use the "muh no free time" excuse.
i dont currently have a job so yeah i can finish some, after college finishes i will be free to do whatever, the issue is that i was doing a game dev thing for college so all my time was spent developing a game FOR college which means I can't continue any of my projects. Anyways, yes I make assets for all my projects, sounds, sprites, music, everything. I like to use Staplers to make gun noises because you can slide them back to imitate loading a shotgun or sliding a rack on a pistol.
 
i dont currently have a job so yeah i can finish some, after college finishes i will be free to do whatever, the issue is that i was doing a game dev thing for college so all my time was spent developing a game FOR college which means I can't continue any of my projects. Anyways, yes I make assets for all my projects, sounds, sprites, music, everything. I like to use Staplers to make gun noises because you can slide them back to imitate loading a shotgun or sliding a rack on a pistol.
>after college
can't be thinking like that else you'll only get to do the things you want to do when you end up retiring (and then die of old age before finishing anything)
how long would college take anyways?
 
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lies, no one says this irl
 
>after college
can't be thinking like that else you'll only get to do the things you want to do when you end up retiring (and then die of old age before finishing anything)
how long would college take anyways?
its ending soon so im going to be able to make a lot more stuff hopefully
and i dont want to go into game design or game dev more because it will just take up all the time i want to use on actual projects
 
its ending soon so im going to be able to make a lot more stuff hopefully
and i dont want to go into game design or game dev more because it will just take up all the time i want to use on actual projects
nigger you're 19 wdym ending soon
are you only doing a short course in college or some shit like that?
 
<3 years is short
i guess it was short then. and i have only turned 19 recently, to be honest.
ngl college was kind of a waste of my time for the first few years i was doing it.
 
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